![]() ![]() The original was a satisfying 90 minutes long, but the remake clocks in around two hours. In that regard, Aladdin does not bode well for anyone old enough to drink but otherwise unable to when the movie is actually playing. Who cares what kind of movie he likes? Children’s movies are just Trojan horse enjoyment for adults who are forced to take their kids to a family-friendly movie. Sure, kids might like it, but kids like garbage! My friend’s toddler son loves to watch me scream at him on FaceTime his favorite toy appears to be his dog’s foot. It remains completely unclear who wanted a live-action version of a movie like Dumbo, which is basically a horror movie about a morose elephant and Colin Farrell, but desired or not, Disney plans on making more of these well into the next decade, much to the chagrin of anyone who grew up on hand-drawn cartoon movies rather than CGI cats voiced by God herself.įeeling crusty about movies from your childhood getting remakes is little more than a great reminder that millennials are getting old and no one cares what we think about people “ruining” the things we loved when we were growing up - but that doesn’t change the fact that the new Aladdin is objectively terrible. The new movie, directed by Guy Ritchie (What? Why?), is the latest in a slate of Disney live-action films adapted from their decades-old animated sources: Cinderella, Maleficent, Christopher Robin, The Jungle Book, Alice Through the Looking Glass, and Beauty and the Beast along with the forthcoming Lion King, Lady and the Tramp, Mulan, and The Little Mermaid. So in what world would the live-action Aladdin remake, out this Friday, ever match up to what only a cartoon could accomplish? Nothing kills a kids movie quite like getting bored enough to ask adult questions. Best of all, he keeps the movie moving so fast that you don’t have time to stop, take a beat, and wonder if what’s going on makes any sense. And it works - Genie is one of the better Disney sidekicks: He’s warm and funny and kinetic, a giant blue freak who can morph into a slot machine or Jack Nicholson or a zombie or a sheep or Arsenio Hall. The original Genie was famously written for Robin Williams, and he did so much improv in the voice recordings that they had to rebuild parts of the script around him. Genie was the only character that lightened a movie that was mostly blandly romantic or kind of terrifying. I’d rewind to a few key parts in the original Aladdin when I was a kid - Genie’s frenzied introduction, Genie singing Aladdin into the palace, Genie finally being set free. Aladdin was a vehicle for Robin Williams’ manic energy. Sure, it pretends to be a story about a street rat winning over a princess, or about a princess trying to gain some autonomy, or about a bad guy yearning for ultimate power. How many Disney movies about brown people was I going to get when I was a kid? Not many, so I learned to love what I had.īut even with all the representation afforded to me by these fictional brown people, there’s no denying that Aladdin is the genie’s movie. When adults asked me what my favorite movie was, I told them Aladdin, not necessarily because it was true - that honor went to Sleeping Beauty because I liked the way Maleficent said “Why so melancholy?” to some idiot white guy she captured - but because it seemed apt. You can listen to the new version of "Arabian Nights" here.The original animated Aladdin came out just a year after I was born, but I wore through the VHS for years afterward. It's tough to compete with the original lyrics, though. Disney also changes the lyrics to "Arabian Nights" again. ![]() The peddler was merely telling viewers about a legend. It's one of the best changes the live-action film makes to the story in terms of story. In the 2019 film, a future version of the Genie recalls the story of Aladdin and Jasmine years later to his two children. The original opening of "Aladdin" contained the lyric " where they cut off your ear if they don't like your face," a line which was changed when the film was released on video to the friendlier " where it's flat and immense and the heat is intense." The story of Aladdin (played by Mena Massoud) and Jasmine (Naomi Scott) is then told to us by the unnamed peddler. In the original movie, "Aladdin" opens on the song "Arabian Nights" with a peddler riding across the desert on a camel on his way to Agrabah. This version of "Arabian Nights" is much more family friendly from its original incarnation. Account icon An icon in the shape of a person's head and shoulders. ![]()
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